SPALDING
  • Male
  • BumFuck, Texas
  • United States
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What makes you so special?
Well, shit the bed! Howdy folks, come on in! Well, I can see by those fancy britches and sassy hairdos that you all ain't from around here. So, where ya from? I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Ah, I see. All ya all's must be mutes, cause ya wouldn't be fuckin' with me, now would ya?
Well I'll tell you what. Why don't you just take your Mama home some chicken and then I won't have to stuff my boot all up in your ass!!!
What is your Gender?.......Relationship Status?........Sexual Orientation?
Male
Where are your people from?
Well, I don't really know. You see, they wasn't in here long enough for me to get up close and personal with them like I do most of the other assholes that come wondering in here!
What offends you?
What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
What are your favorite body parts?..........On Yourself?.............Males?...........Females?..........Chicken?
You miserable motherfucker, I ought to leap over this counter and bash your fuckin' balls in!
What do you LOVE..........Who Do You Love...........Who's your Daddy
Boy, I bet you'd stick your head in fire if I told ya you could see Hell. Meanwhile, you're too stupid to realize you got a demon stickin' out your ass singing, "Holy Miss Moley, Well, It's all true. The bogeyman is real and you found him.
You know when a horse makes that lip flapping sound? What dew you call that
If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I'd fart."
If you had 6 months to live, what would you do?
Listen, you Malibu middle class Barbie piece of shit, I'm tryin' to work here. Work? You ever work? Yeah, I'll bet you have. Scoopin' ice cream to your shit-heel friends on summer break. Well I ain't talkin' about no goddamn white socks with Mickey Mouse on one side and Donald Duck on the other. I ain't readin' no funny books, mama. Our bodies come and go but this blood... is forever.
Why are you not doing that now?
Goddamn, motherfucker got blood all over my best clown suit.
Given Time, what does VULGARIA mean to you?
Howdy Folks! You like blood? Violence? Freaks of nature? Well then, come on down to Captain Spaulding's Museum of Monsters and Mad-Men. See the Alligator Boy, ride my famous Murder Ride. Most of all, don't forget to take home some of my tasty fried chicken! Ha ha! It just tastes so damn good!
 

That's "CAPTAIN" Spalding to you ASSHOLE!!!


Howdy Folks! You like blood? Violence? Freaks of nature? Well then, come on down to Captain Spalding's Museum of Monsters and Mad-Men. See the Alligator Boy, ride my famous Murder Ride. Most of all, don't forget to take home some of my tasty fried chicken! Ha ha! It just tastes so damn good!

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Comment Wall (166 comments)

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At 11:06pm on October 14, 2009, Daniel The Last said…
At 3:35pm on October 3, 2009, BadPenny619 said…
Have a wickedly delicious weekend!!
GOOD TIMES!

At 10:23pm on September 27, 2009, BABYDIABOLICAL said…
At 3:04pm on September 27, 2009, BABYDIABOLICAL said…
At 9:40am on September 27, 2009, BABYDIABOLICAL said…
At 6:54am on September 24, 2009, Green Briar said…
PhotobucketPhotobucket Photobucket Photobucket
At 12:28pm on September 6, 2009, Daniel The Last said…

At 12:25pm on September 6, 2009, Daniel The Last said…
jourdiemacpherson@gmail.com
At 12:18pm on September 6, 2009, Daniel The Last said…
kelleyda@earthlink.net
At 12:51pm on September 4, 2009, Green Briar said…
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Well... shit the bed
Howdy Folks

WELCOME TO VULGARIA
Click on All the
Gold Stuff
and go sign the god damn Rules page before i have to put my boot up in ya ass and Thank you very much



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Green Briar

38 ODD Things about you!

Posted by Green Briar on November 10, 2009 at 2:50pm

AngryPrincess

Modern Man’s Kama Sutra

Posted by AngryPrincess on November 10, 2009 at 3:18am

Mike

A Must watch!

Posted by Mike on November 8, 2009 at 2:14pm

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Hello Kiddy Winks

Lets play a little game. A game I play inside my brain. A game thats called...Go Insane ...hehehehehehehehe Ahh...heres a delicious little game we like to play....and don't you want to know what it's called ?

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